This past week has been very difficult for me. I’ve been quite ill, and pretty much unable to speak on one subject that has been hitting me upside the head, over and over again through the media: the Planned Parenthood and Komen debacle.

A little back story:

I have been a Susan G. Komen 3-day participant since 2008.  I have raised well over $7,000 for the organization.  The walks have literally changed my life for the better.  I walk more than I ever would have before, I give more, and they also opened my eyes to a community that is nothing but supportive and caring.

Planned Parenthood was a part of my life throughout my early 20′s.  They were my health care provider, and they were the only reason I was able to afford birth control.  They also were the ones that found a suspicious spot on my breast and then subsequently sent me to another doctor for a second opinion.  They also paid for that visit.  Things turned out fine, but it was a key moment in my life, I believe, that sent me eventually to Komen’s doorstep.

So, with all of the social and main stream media frenzy going on, I have found my self split in two.  It had me questioning if everything I’ve been doing these past 5 years has been right or wrong. It has left me heartbroken and confused.

But then, this week, a blogger that I silently followed and very much looked up to passed away….metastatic inflammatory breast cancer took her just two days ago. And with a blink of an eye I realized that all of these issues are nothing compared to how her family is feeling now.

I looked to Susan’s blog for answers or thoughts. Should I continue in this fight? What would she say about the events of this week? I really don’t know, but I did find this blog post (http://toddlerplanet.wordpress.com/category/pink-tober/) on her thoughts about the “pinkwashing” of October, and I find it may just point me in the right direction.

She writes:

“What I want to say here, and I don’t really know how, is that I APPRECIATE the efforts of all the people and organizations in the world bringing attention to a color that has already gotten a lot of attention this month: pink. There are shades of goodness in pink and shades that worry me. I realize now that they can co-exist, and that we can appreciate and enjoy all the shades of pink without declaring them ALL GOOD or all worthless, and that each shade of pink makes a contribution to the Fall mosaic around us that is bringing awareness and action to breast cancers, and is fighting the good fight in the way that feels right to them.

 

Today, I thank all the people and all the organizations formed across the globe that support the fight against breast cancer, that raise awareness, that raise funds for research, and that raise the spirits of those who struggle with this disease, in their own bodies or in that of the friends and family who they love. NEVER DOUBT that what you do makes a difference. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”

This.

There have been a lot more variances added to the color pink this week.  Not all of them good, not all of them bad.  But all of them are still working to the same goal.

Did Komen go wrong in my eyes?  Yes.  Was this a total PR nightmare?  Yes.  Is Planned Parenthood any worse for it?  Not at all, better so in fact.  Do I fault anyone for going to another breast cancer organization?  No….it’s just another shade of pink.

Are there still women and men dying from this disease every. freaking. day?

YES. YES. YES.

Susan lived as long as she did thanks to the countless people who have supported the fight against cancer.  But Susan still deserved many, many more years.

This is why I will not walk away.  Komen, even with all of it’s faults, has advanced our cause by leaps and bounds.  I hope that they learn from this mistake and grow – and maybe this whole fallout was written in the stars so that growth could happen.  Maybe if I stick around, my voice will be heard and growth WILL happen.

I am many things.  I am not perfect.  I am not all-seeing and all-knowing.  Hell, I’m not even 100% on this decision.

But what I am is Pro-freedom of thought.  I am Pro-second chances.  I’m am Pro-women.  I am Pro-active.  I am pro-health and pro-longer lives for all.

I am pro-cure.

 This image provided by www.pro-cure.me!